Holding her sister-in-law’s hand througout the op and whispering words of encouragement, Melissa was watching the arrival of her own baby son.
After eight miscarriages in as many years, her dream of having a family with husband Joe was slipping away.
But it came true at last when Joe’s sister Amy offered to be a surrogate. And in April 2019, she gave birth to baby Rowan.
Melissa, 36, says: “Amy is our angel. After years of heartache and loss, we finally have a child of our own. Without Amy, it would never have been possible.”
Melissa, a special needs officer from the New Forest, Hants, met Joe, 36, a sales manager, in 2006.
Four years later, they started trying for a baby. Born without the tricuspid valve in her heart, Melissa was told she would struggle to carry a baby to full term. She says: “I’d always wanted to be a mum, and it was so frustrating every month when my period arrived. After a year of trying, I finally got pregnant.
“When I showed Joe the positive pregnancy test, we both squealed with excitement. I was nervous because doctors had warned us my chances of miscarrying were high. Eight weeks later, my fears came true.”
With agonising cramps and bleeding heavily, Joe took her to the A&E department at Salisbury District Hospital.
Melissa says: “Doctors examined me and told me I’d miscarried. We were both devastated. My only consolation was that I knew I could get pregnant.”
They kept trying but suffered more heartbreaking losses — in December 2013 and again the following March, when Melissa started to bleed while 18 weeks pregnant. Four days later, a baby boy was stillborn.
She says: “The labour was traumatic. I can’t describe the sadness of not hearing my baby cry. We had some time with him to take footprints and create a memory box. Joe and I were devastated.
“After I was discharged from hospital, I took time off work to grieve. Amy was so supportive. Every couple of weeks we’d meet for lunch and I was open about my miscarriages with her.”
A cardiac doctor advised Melissa to stop trying for a baby due to the high risk of miscarriage. They were determined to upset the odds — but five more pregnancies failed over the following five years, all within the first few weeks.
Melissa says: “Every time I found out I was pregnant, I couldn’t get excited as I knew I’d lose it. It was heartbreaking.”
In June 2015 the brave pair got married.
Melissa says: “We made our vows at the most beautiful Georgian house in the countryside, with all our families and friends gathered around.
“Even though we knew we might not be able to have children due to my condition, we knew we would stick by each other.”
Then in March 2016, a routine check-up for her heart condition revealed she had an irregular heartbeat.
Melissa says: “Over the next year, I had six operations. Then, in August 2017, after another operation, my consultant delivered the final blow — due to my poor health, it would be impossible for me to carry a baby to full term because the pregnancy would be too high-risk.
“My hopes were crushed. It felt like the end of the road. Joe and I didn’t know where to go from there. Our families were devastated for us.”
As Melissa recovered from her final heart surgery, Amy, now 34 and mum to Phoebe, five, made her amazing offer to be a surrogate.
“I asked Amy if she was sure — and she was adamant. She told us she’d been thinking about it for a year. She had no health conditions, her previous pregnancy had been fine and Phil, her husband, was fully supportive. We were over the moon.”
The following week, the three went to a seminar on surrogacy in Portsmouth.
Melissa says: “We looked at clinics and visited a solicitor to gain an insight into the legal aspect of it. Once the baby was born, Amy would be the legal parent, so we’d have to go to court to be granted parental responsibility for the child.
“After attending a private fertility clinic in Southampton, we were all invested. IVF would cost us £15,000 but we had savings put aside.
“In January 2018, a counsellor cleared Amy as emotionally ready to carry our baby and her scans and blood tests came back clear.”
The next month, Melissa and Joe travelled to the IVF clinic in Southampton to freeze her eggs. Amy had hormone treatment to prepare for her cycle and in July 2018, the couple’s embryo was transferred into Amy’s uterus.
Melissa says: “They managed to freeze one successful embryo, so we only had one chance. They told us there was a 50-50 chance of the embryo implanting.
“I held on to Amy’s hand as they implanted the embryo. Then it was the longest 12-day wait. I felt constantly on edge.
“Twelve days later, Amy texted me a picture of a positive pregnancy test. Joe and I burst into tears of happiness. We still worried something would go wrong but we knew Amy was taking care of the baby.
“She sent us constant updates and ate a healthy diet to give the baby the best chance. We baked her batches of lemon cake to help with her pregnancy cravings and when I felt the baby wriggling in her belly, I was overwhelmed with excitement.”
At 16 weeks, the couple were delighted to find out they were expecting a boy.
Melissa says: “At our scans, they told us only the parents were allowed into the room. Joe would joke, ‘My sister’s having my baby!’ It was wonderful seeing their reactions.”
The day before her due date, Amy was diagnosed with pre-eclampsia, a potentially serious condition, and booked to have a C-section the next day. With Melissa and Joe by her side, baby Rowan was born on April 13, 2019, weighing 8lb 15oz.
Melissa says: “When the midwife held him up, I cried out in sheer relief. They placed the baby in a cot and Amy nodded for me to hold him first. When I held him tight to my chest, it finally felt real. He was perfect.
“I couldn’t believe he was here. Four days later, Amy kissed him goodbye and we took him home. Joe and I couldn’t thank her enough.”
Now 17 months old, Rowan has a special bond with Amy.
As Melissa says: “When she visits, Rowan’s face lights up. She loves him to pieces too.
“When Rowan is older, we’ll tell him about how his special auntie brought him into this world.
“Becoming parents was the best feeling in the world and we have Amy to thank.
“She is our angel and we’ll for ever be indebted to her.”
Amy, who works as a marketing co-ordinator and whose husband Phil, 42, runs a car dealership, says: “I have absolutely no regrets about being a surrogate.
“When Melissa was given the news she wouldn’t be able to carry her own baby, I was devastated for her. By that point, I’d already been considering offering to be Melissa’s surrogate for a year.